


Little Black Book

by Pinkgiraffe1604



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Coming Out, Depression, Diary/Journal, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, High School, Light Angst, M/M, Very Secret Diary, klance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-14
Updated: 2019-06-14
Packaged: 2020-05-07 14:49:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 5,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19211656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pinkgiraffe1604/pseuds/Pinkgiraffe1604
Summary: The little black book that Keith carried with him EVERYWHERE was the thing in life he cherished most. It had everything in it, from his depression clouded thoughts to his major crush on his long time best friend Lance McClain to songs he wrote. What will happen when those thoughts become public knowledge?





	1. Little Black Book

**Author's Note:**

> This was previously one of my books from another fandom which I have changed and put into the world of Voltron. If things accidentally don't make sense I'm sorry. Feel free to leave a comment or message me on Tumblr @pinkgiraffe1604.  
> Also any writing that is meant to be in Keith’s diary will be in bold if it isn’t in bold then it is happening outside of his diary. Also I know this seems sad and there will be sad parts but I promise, all my stories have a happy ending.

The little black book that Keith carried with him EVERYWHERE was the thing in life he cherished most. It had everything in it, from his depression clouded thoughts to his major crush on his long time best friend Lance McClain to songs he wrote.

He had started the book as requested by his therapist which he saw once a week after school. He had told Keith that maybe getting his thought out of his head would make them not seem as bad as it originally did, so reluctantly he began one.

This was 3 months ago.

At first he didn’t know what to write but over the course of the first two weeks it got easier and suddenly the words would just spill out of him every time he wrote. It wasn’t the sort of diary that he wrote everyday about what happened and who he spoke to, he writes whenever he wants to get things off his chest. This caused this book to have all of his deepest and darkest thoughts in it, including previous events, such as his suicide attempt that NO ONE but his parents knew about, around 3 months ago, that lead to him getting a therapist.

Keith also hated calling it a diary and therefore referred to it as his ‘little black book’

Keith and Lance had been best friends for as long as they could remember. Keith had first began to have feelings he couldn’t explain about Lance when he was 10, when he was 13 he figured out what they meant. He was now 15 (as of about 3 weeks ago) and so was Lance. In total he had liked Lance for around 5 years but had only realised it was a crush for 2 years. He had told NO ONE this apart from his little black book and Shiro (his therapist). Keith and Lance pretty much ruled the school together. They were the most popular and everyone loved them.

Shiro was like another Little Black book. He knew almost everything about Keith. Their weekly sessions were mainly Keith just ranting about his thoughts because this was the best way for him to get everything out. Keith liked Shiro, they got along well and he knew that he could always count on him. It was a good relationship to have with someone especially when you keep all that so hidden from everyone else.


	2. Three months

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It has been 3 months to the day since Keith's failed suicide attempt

**My life nearly ended three months ago to the day. August 26th was almost the last day of my life. So nearly. Am I glad it didn’t end, I never thought I’d say this but for the most part yes. Shiro is making me think of things I’m looking forward to. I know that I’ve got so much further to go in life and although some days are REALLY hard there will always be at least one more good day in my future and I want to see that. That doesn’t mean that my depression is cured or that I no longer have dark, scary thoughts. It means that I’m trying to keep going no matter what. Ugh I have to leave for school. Time for another day of a plastered on fake smile while everyone talks to me. Yay - not. At least Lance is back in today after not being in Friday. I don’t have to face it alone.**

Keith shoved the book into his backpack and then put everything else on top of it. He took it everywhere with him. He knew that if he left it at home his parents would 100% look through it. He knows they’re just worried but they know he goes to Shiro and nothing too bad has happened since.

Keith keeps it at the bottom of his bag so it never accidentally falls out and no one can see it. His bag also stays as close to him as possible as much as possible. He made sure that his name is NOWHERE in it but anyone I’m talking about is. He doesn’t have enough brain capacity to change their names and remember who’s who so.

His walk to school isn’t too long around 15 minutes.

“Hey Keith” A hand was placed on his shoulder from behind as his blue eyed, brown haired best friend began to walk beside him into the school gates.

“Hi Lance” Keith said trying not to blush at the fact that Lance had touched him. He had it so bad for him.

“Guess who is lucky enough to have a full day of sitting next to me” Lance said cheerily

“Sounds pretty unlucky if you ask me” Keith joked. Lance mimicked offence.

“Ouch, being mean doesn’t change where you sit, however it will change how annoying I am”

“Nooooo, your already so annoying how could you possibly become more annoying”

“Just wait and see, mister, wait and see” Lance said and they both walked to first lesson laughing.


	3. Must Stay Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith and Shiro talk about keeping his depression hidden

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anything in BOLD is Keith's Diary

Wanna come to mine after school, I think Pidge and Hunk are coming?" Lance asked Keith at lunch.

"Sorry I can't my mom is making me help my dad clean out the garage, maybe tomorrow?" Keith lied, not wanting to tell him the real reason which was his appointment with Shiro.

**I hate lying to Lance, I really do but there was no way I can tell him about Shiro or about my depression. I just can’t. Usually my appointments are on Fridays but Shiro insisted that I had another one today because of what today is. I agreed honestly I like being able to just get everything out.**

*Time Skip*

"So how have you been" Shiro asked me

"Alright, Lance was back in today so I didn't have to talk to everyone alone and there wasn't 50 more people talking to me asking me where he was. I had a full day of sitting next to him which took my mind off things a lot. I made a joke about me being really unlucky to have to sit by him and that made him 10x more annoying but it was really cute he just talked constantly or would poke me. But then I had to lie to him at lunch about not being able to go to his tonight because I was helping my dad clean the garage. I felt like shit doing it."

"I know you enough by now to know that suggesting that maybe you tell him, wouldn't be wise"Keith sent Shiro a death glare.

"You know I can't, I just can't he wouldn't understand it besides I don't want anyone to think any differently about me than they do now"

"Keith, I've said it so many times before and I'm going to say it again. You can';t help having depression just like you can't help being gay, You didn't make a choice for either of them to be a part of your life but they are.They’re a part of you whether you like it or not and you shouldn’t be ashamed of them.” Shiro told him.

“I’m not ashamed it’s just no one understands especially people my age and I don’t want to be different”

“They’re are 100% more people who are your age who are dealing with similar things, I’m not saying to go around with a massive sign on you saying ‘Hi I’m Keith, I’m gay and I have depression’ what I’m saying is maybe telling at least one of your friends might benefit you. From what I’ve heard Lance is lovely and would keep it a secret if you asked him to”

“Lance is lovely” Keith agreed “He’s the best person I know, not to mention the hottest. But I’ve known him since we were like 3 and I’ve liked him since I was 10. I just don’t want anything to change for the worst”

“I get it, besides you have me, what more could you want?” Shiro joked

Keith really did love having him as his therapist most of the time

“Shut up” They laughed


	4. Songs

Keith was sitting at his keyboard. He just felt like writing something. He started playing chords and this is what came out:

I’m all alone  
Couldn’t help but shut myself away  
The distance has grown  
It’s my fault just wanted someone to want to stay  
4 months, with no one  
Getting lost in my imagination  
Don’t want to live this life  
When will my mind, return to being mine?

Keith loved playing and writing songs it just allowed a different way for him to get things off his chest than just scribbling all the time.

No one had ever heard Keith sing. He always made sure his parents couldn’t hear him. He loved having it as just something he knew about - not even Shiro knew.

His phone bussed from on his bed so he went and lay down.

Lance: Hey, how was cleaning out the garage?  
Keith: Not too bad, could have been worse, what you doing?  
Lance: Just being bored thought I’d message you  
Keith: Wow I love being a last option 😂  
Lance: I could have messaged anyone but I didn’t I messaged you

That message made Keiths heart flutter and his cheeks go bright red. He understood he was his best friend and would never be anything more but he couldn’t help the way Lance made him feel.

We talked for a while longer before I decided to go to bed.

*Time Skip*

Before I knew it, it was Thursday. My least favourite day of the week. I had PE and the lesson itself wasn’t too bad however I hated the getting changed part. I was very self conscious and didn’t really like my body, so rushing to get changed was my go to. However today my sock had managed to worm its way to the bottom of my bag so I had to fetch EVERYTHING out ugh. The bell rang and had to rush to put everything away and get to my next class on time.

The little black book sat all alone on a bench in the changing rooms. A pair of eyes notice it and walk towards the bench. Hands pick it up and proceed to flip through it.


	5. Read (Sad)

The Cafeteria was loud as usual. Everyone was sat in their little groups talking to their friends. Keiths table had 4 people. Keith, Lance, Hunk and Pidge. They were all good friends but Lance and Keith were BEST friends. They were laughing and joking between themselves when the noise began to die down. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen may I please have your attention” A boy in their year shouted, his name was James. He was stood on top of a table with something in his hands.  
“I recently found this in the boys changing room and I thought it would be really fun for you to all hear what I have read” He gestured to the things in his hands, it was some kind of black notebook.

He cleared his throat.  
“ **Lance. Lance McClain. Just the sound of his voice makes my chest grow warm and my cheeks turn pink. I have it so bad for him. I mean it’s kinda hard not to, have you seen him** ” He began. This sounded so familiar to Keith, why did it? He looked over at Lance who had a confused look on his face.  
“ **His smile lights up a room, his eyes are like the ocean and damn I’m lost at sea. I hate the fact that he’ll never like me back. I’m just gay and depressed whilst he is straight and gorgeous. Ugh why does life have to be so unfair** ”

Keith’s mind was screaming to do something. He now knew why this was so familiar it was HIS black book. He wanted to run over snatch it out of James’ hands and run away again, curl up into a ball and never see anyone EVER. But he knew if he did that people would know it was his so he just had to sit there and listen to James reading out all of Keiths deepest thoughts. He looked over at Lance again, who still has a confused look on his face however it’s also kind of sympathetic now

“Oooooo, and look the little queer even wrote a song  
 **Why won’t you ever see  
Me like I see you  
Why won’t you ever like  
Me like I like you  
I just want you to  
Notice me like I do you  
I just want you to notice me**  
Aww how adorable was that”

At this point Lance stood up, Keith thought he was going to walk out to save himself the embarrassment, something he wished he could do but Lance didn’t.

“Shut the fuck up, get down and grow up” He said in a very serious tone “What has ANY of this got to do with you. Nothing. Therefore stop getting involved and stop reading peoples personal shit. You’re just being an arsehole”

That. That was something Keith always had loved about Lance. He had no clue who he was sicking up for but did it anyway. That was just the kind of guy he was.

“But I’m almost done Lance, just one more very interesting thing. The 8th of September”

Keith felt the blood drain from his face. He thought James would only read out the stuff about Lance. His chest grew tight.

*Trigger Warning*

“ **I wish my mom had just left me laying on the bathroom floor. I wish she hadn’t shouted for my dad. I wish they hadn’t rushed me to the hospital so the doctors and nurses could save my stupid, pathetic life. I wanted to die. I WANT to die. I can’t deal with everything anymore. Next time I’ll just have to cut deeper then there won’t be as much time to save me. I’m so pathetic that I can’t get my own suicide right. I can’t do anything right. My arms itch SOOOOO badly, but mom and dad locked up all the sharp things. All I need to do is get out of their sights for 10 minutes I still have some razors left in my bedside drawer. They don’t actually care whether I live or die they just don’t want it to be on their hands. August 26th the day my life almost ended and I wish it had. No one cares about me, they SHOULDN’T care about me. I’m worthless, I’m disgusting, I don’t deserve anyone’s love. I don’t deserve anything.** ” He finished

Keith felt tears welling in his eyes that he rapidly tried to blink away. He realised he had been unconsciously scratching his arms and immediately stopped trying to avoid any suspicion from anyone.

“James Griffin get off that table this instant and give me that” A teacher said snatching my book from his hands “This will be in lost and found incase anyone wants to collect it”

Keith looked over at Lance once again and his annoyed expression had turn to a soft, sad one.

Keith couldn’t go and collect it he knew if he did then people would know it was his. WTF was he going to do?


	6. Control

As soon as school was over Keith ran out the gates and he kept running. He knew exactly where he was going.

When he arrived at the building where Shiro’s office was I went up to the receptionist. She was always lovely. Her name was Allura.

“I-need-to-see-Shiro-like-right-now” Keith said between breaths

“Oh my god are you ok?” She asked coming round to his side of the desk and taking him over to a seat

He slowly calmed his breathing before talking again

“Yes, well no, not really, I just need to see Shiro”  
“He went out like half an hour ago he said he wouldn’t be long”  
“Ok, I’ll wait for him to come back”

The next 5 minutes felt like forever. Keith’s palms were sweating, his breathing was shallow and his leg wouldn’t stop shaking.

He could see Allura occasionally glance over at him, a worried expression in her face.

He heard the door buzz as someone opened it. 

“Keith, I didn’t expect you to get here so quickly. I only texted you 10 minutes ago” Shiro said standing in the doorway, Keith’s black book in hand.

“What?” He questioned “I didn’t see a text, what text?” Keith asked sliding his phone out of his pocket where it had been the whole time. Sure enough there was a message.

Shiro: Hey, just went to ur school to pick up ur book, what happened?

“Want to come through?” Shiro said gesturing to the door to his office. Keith just simply nodded and followed, sending a thankful smile Allura’s way.

“How do you have that?” Keith asked

“Well remember when a certain genius told you we should put my contact information in the front of the book so we could get it back if it was lost without anyone knowing it was yours?” He said “Well the school rang me and said they had it in ‘lost and found’ and that I should come collect it at the end of class. However I explained that I’m not a student but a therapist and the book belonged to a client of mine so I went to pick it up after school. I was already worried, I mean I know you never let this out of your sight so I was wondering how it got ‘lost’ but then the woman I collected it from said and I quote “The kid that belongs to might need another session after what happened today” so then I got real worried. What happened today?”

That’s when Keith finally broke. The tears that he had been holding back all day were streaming down his face. He was hyperventilating, going back and forth from scratching my arms to running my hands through my hair violently. He was so overwhelmed with everything that had happened today. TOO overwhelmed with keeping it all in until this point. Hecouldn’t stop. It was like

He had lost control.


	7. No one knows

3 month old thoughts.  
Too much.  
Everything.  
Whizzing around his head.  
Explode.  
His brain is going to explode.  
Trapped.  
help.  
Help.  
HELP.

Keith’s breathing seemed to ceased to exist and it felt like he was slowly suffocating.

He could hear Shiro but only partly, like his ears were trying to block everything out because his brain was already too overwhelmed.

After what seemed like 5 minutes (but was actually almost 40) Keith managed to be able to talk.

“I-must-have-left-it-in-the-changing-room-a-a-after-PE-and-some-kid-found-it-He-read-parts-of-it-out-in-front-of-my-whole-year” He said between choked breaths

“Oh Keith, that’s really fucking shitty of him to do. What bits did he read?” Shiro asked, voice full of sympathy.

“Just-a-bit-about-how-much-I-like-Lance-and-a-song-i-wrote-about-him...........and-the-8th-of-September” I stuttered out. He looked slight confused at me

“Do you mind if I read that so I know what you’re talking about?” He asked, that’s something else Keith loved about having Shiro as his therapist, he ALWAYS respected his boundaries.

“Sure-everyone-else-has already heard it” Keith said his breathing slowing down but more tears starting to come at the end of his sentence.

Shiro read it, tears coming to his eyes.

“That must have been so hard to deal with, what did you do?”

“I just had to sit there and listen, tears came to my eyes and I-“ Keith cut himself off lowering his hands realising he had been doing it again “I was subconsciously scratching my arms but stopped when I realised cause I didn’t want anyone to be suspicious. I had to hold it together for almost 2 hours and as soon as I could I ran straight here”

“Yeah Allura messaged me to say you were here and didn’t look the best”

“I don’t know how I’m gonna face anyone tomorrow, I know they don’t know it’s me but they still know my thoughts”

“Keith, I understand that you’re gonna have to get your trust back for the book so I have some suggestions, here” he said pulling some sort of box out of his desk draw “This is a lock box, you can keep the book at home without the fear of anyone getting into it because you have the key”

“Thank you”

“I’m also gonna up your sessions to twice a week for a little bit just Incase your struggling to write so you can talk”

“Thank you, this means a lot”

“Just remember that no one knows it was you”


	8. Comfort

Keith’s phone rang loudly throughout the room. It was around 8:30 at night. He hadn’t spoke to his parents since he had gotten home. They were concerned because he had been home late. They must have called Shiro though because they left him alone after a bit. Keith was lying on his bed just staring at the ceiling hoping the ground would swallow him and he would disappear.

But that didn’t happen so he slowly reached for his phone and answered it without looking at the caller ID.

“Hey Keith” The voice came through the phone. Panic rose in his chest, it was Lance.

“Hi” Keith said his voice weak and hoarse from my crying and meltdown earlier.

“Are you okay?” He asked 

“Yeah” Keith replied unconvincingly

“No you’re not, what’s wrong?”

“I’m okay, I promise”

“No you’re not, I’m coming over”

Keith sighed, he hated it when the things he loved about Lance come back to bite him in the ass. He was so persistent in making sure everyone was ok.

There was a knock on the front door.

Keith’s mom opened it and Lance was stood there

“Hey, I’m here for Keith”

“Sure, he’s in his room” 

He went up the stairs and she turned to her husband.

“I thought Keith wouldn’t want to talk to anyone after what happened today. I mean Shiro said something of his got lost and someone found it and he had a meltdown”

“Maybe he’s finally ready to tell someone, I mean out of everyone I would expect that to be Lance”

Josh didn’t bother knocking on Keith’s bedroom door. Keith knew he was coming and this has pretty much been his second home since they were like 3.

Keith was lying on his back staring at the ceiling. Lance came over and sat on the end of his bed, crossed legged and looking at him.

“What’s wrong Keith?” he asked

Keith sat up before answering “Just feeling kinda shitty” he said aware he wasn’t going to be able to get away with saying ‘I’m fine’.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Lance asked

“Not really”

“You want a hug?”

“Sure”

Lance moved next to him and lay down, Keith lay back next to him and Lance wrapped his arms around him.

This was something else he loved about Lance. He was never weird about hugs or showing affection towards his friends, if anything he loved it. He understood that even though we were guys it was still normal for us to get sad and you know have emotions unlike so many others think.

They just lay there for a while until Lance spoke up.

“I feel really bad” he said. Keith lifted his head from where it was on his chest.

“What about?” He asked

“The guy who’s book was read out today. I mean even though no one knows who he is he still had his feelings read out in front of everyone. People now know that someone in our year is 1. Gay 2. Has a crush on me 3. Writes songs and 4. Tried and nearly succeeded in killing themselves in August. That must be so hard knowing that everyone knows almost everything about you apart from who you are”

Tear were welling in Keith’s eyes and he tried to blink them away. Lance understood it perfectly but there was no way he could tell him it was him. He didn’t want to ruin the best friendship he’d ever had. Keith kept his reply short

“Yeah that person must be having a really shitty day”


	9. Embrace

Keith woke up arms encircling him. He looked to his left and saw Lance still laying next to him just like last night. They must’ve fell asleep.

There was a light knock at his door. He reluctantly and slowly crawled out of Lance’s war embrace; if life always went his way he would never leave it.

He opened the door and came face to face with his mom.

“Hey sweetie, I’m just waking you up because schools starting soon and I didn’t hear Lance leave last night so I assumed he was still here. You don’t have to go in today, I spoke to Shiro yesterday and he didn’t say exactly what happened, just told me that you may not be good for a bit” She said rubbing his arm at the last part

“Nah, I’m gonna go in. I’ll be ok” Keith didn’t know if that was the truth but he was hoping and praying that it was. IHecouldn’t have the day off, how suspicious would that look?

He closed the door and went back over to his bed. He longed to climb back in and once again fall asleep with Lance’s arms wrapped tightly around him but he knew he couldn’t do that. They had to get ready for another day of hell.

“Lance, wake up, school starts soon” He said gently shaking Lance’s shoulders. His eyes fluttered open and he smiled at Keith.

“Sorry I didn’t mean to fall asleep. I was gonna leave when you did but I guess I was more tired than I thought” he said beginning to get up.

“It’s fine” Keith said aware of the slight blush on his cheeks because what Lance said meant he saw him asleep.

“Oh shit! I don’t have any clothes and I wore these to school yesterday”

“It’s fine you can just borrow some of mine, we’re pretty much the same size so they should fit”

“Thanks”

Keith grabbed him and himself jeans, T-shirt and a hoodie, they rushed to get ready and headed out to school.


	10. Hoodie

School dragged like always but more so today than it ever hasd before.

EVERYONE and I mean everyone was talking about the guy from yesterday. There were rumors about who it was and some were VERY rude.

“I bet it’s that emo kid that always wears black and has the weird fringe”  
“I bet it’s that really short nerdy guy from my chemistry class”

These types of whispers were heard throughout every corridor all day. Keith could tell Lance was getting increasingly more annoyed as the day went on.

He felt bad for him and guilty. He hadn’t been careful and now Lance had been dragged into this mess.

It was lunch when he flipped.

“Oi McClain, do you know who that f*g that that’s shit was read is?” One of the football jocks said as he walked past. Lance stood up.

“No I don’t and if I did I wouldn’t fucking tell ANY of you. Can’t you all just shut you for once in your lives. This has nothing to do with you. Do you not realise that this guy is probably here? He had to sit through someone reading out the most personal things about him and now have people whispering and trying to guess who it is. Do you not care about anyone’s feelings? Someone in our year wanted to kill themself. Someone in our year NEARLY KILLED THEMSELF. WHAT DONT YOU UNDERSTAND ABOUT THAT. What the fuck is wrong with you all? Have some respect for others. Fuck sake” he shouted loud enough for everyone to hear, before rushing out of the cafeteria.

Keith stood up after him and ran to catch up. Lance was speed walking angrily through the corridors.

“Lance, wait for me” he slowed down slightly allowing Keith to catch up

“They’re all arseholes Keith, someone almost died and they don’t care. I feel so bad for the guy”

“I know. People should be more considerate and no one should have to go through what that person went through. Hopefully they’ve gotten help and they’re better now than they were then yeah” Keith said placing his hand on his shoulder, trying desperately not to give away that it was him.

“Yeah, thanks Keith” he said hugging him

“No problem”

The rest of the day came and went. The home time bell rang and Keith was about to head to Shiro’s office for a follow up from yesterday when Lance shouted to him.

“Here you go” he said coming over and taking his hoodie off and giving it to him.

“Thanks” Keith said

“I’ll return the others tomorrow, it would be a bit awkward if I did now” Lance said laughing

Keith feels the blush spread across his face as he quickly said “ok” and hurried away.

He got to Sam’s office and went up to the desk to talk to Allura.

“Thank you for yesterday” he said  
“No problem”

Shiro welcomed him into his office and they spoke about how Keith was feeling and about how his day went.

“So who’s hoodie is that?” Shiro asked as he was getting up to leave

Keith looked down to see the hoodie he had lent Lance. He had been subconsciously playing with it the whole time. He felt a blush rise to his cheeks.

“Mine” Keith said, telling the truth but leaving out the details.

“Why do you have two hoodies” Shiro asked looking at the one he was wearing as well.

“I leant it Lance cause he slept at mine and he just gave it back”

Shiro gave him ‘that’ look and his blush increased.

“Nothing like that AT ALL Takashi Shirogane”

“Wow full name”

“He just insisted on coming over and we fell asleep. It smells like him.” Keith said referencing the one in his hands

“You know what that means?” Shiro asked

“What?”

“You’re bed will smell like him too” he said smirking at Keith before he left.

Those words put a smile on Keith’s face. He couldn’t wait to sleep tonight.


	11. Deputy Head

A week had gone by since the ‘incident’ in the cafeteria and everyone was still talking about it.

Usually gossip and ‘interesting’ things that happened were forgotten about after a day but this, this was big. It felt like people were never gonna forget it.

Even the staff were gossiping about it. Unprofessional, I know. 

There was an assembly and the deputy head spoke:

“So recently as I’m sure you are all aware, someone’s personal writing was read out in front of everyone. The person who did it is being dealt with and will be given the appropriate punishment, however I wanted to talk to all of you about your reactions to the situation. I was in the cafeteria the day after the incident when another student shouted at everyone” Josh blushed slightly and oh my god it was adorable “I agree with a lot of what he said apart from the swearing obviously. I don’t want you all gossiping about who it was, I don’t want you all assuming who it was. I want you all to have the common decency to respect the fact that those thoughts weren’t meant for everyone to be heard. I know some of you are concerned about the welfare of that student because of some of the content in the book however I can assure you we are trying our hardest to find the person and help them if necessary so if you are in here, come and talk to a member of staff, you’re not in trouble we just want to help.” Keith started to panic, there was no way he was going to tell them. He couldn’t let people know it was him. “And if anyone and I mean anyone has any similar thoughts reach out as well. We’re here to talk to.”

The assembly finished and the day went on.

At the end of the day, as students were leaving last period the deputy head caught Lance.

“Lance McClain?”  
“Yes sir”  
“Can we talk in my office please”  
“Sure, can Keith come too, he’s supposed to be coming to mine after school that’s all”  
“I’d prefer it if you were alone”  
“If it’s about the incident in the cafertia then I’d prefer if Keith came, he’s the one I’ve been talking to the whole time about how it’s made me feel”

It was true, since the ‘incident’ Lance had spent probably hours talking about it. He was never angry that he had been dragged into it, he was just upset that someone had those thoughts.

They left with him. Lance went into his office Keith following behind.

“Have a seat boys” they both sat down in the chairs opposite his desk.

“I was just wondering how this has been affecting you, Lance. I mean you found out in front of everyone that someone likes you and that person is a guy and almost died. How are you feeling?”

Keith felt his phone vibrate in my pocket so he slowly slid it out.

“I mean I feel bad for them, having their secrets read out like that, having everyone speculate who they are, how paranoid must they be? I don’t care that I was mentioned sure people say stuff to me but as you heard in the cafeteria I’m not afraid to put them in their place. It honestly makes me so sad though that someone would try to and nearly succeed in killing themselves. Like I knew that these things happened but I didn’t think it would be someone here.”

It was a message from Shiro: Call me when possible  
He was confused but responded  
Keith: Ok, I’m with Lance so I’ll have to pretend you’re my mom or something. It’ll be about 10 mins probably.

“Well if it helps we know that they are in therapy because their therapist came to pick up the book not them. We’re currently trying to get more information from the therapist” once he said that their voices became muffled and Keith got lost in hi thoughts.

What if they found out who he was?  
What if they already know it was him?  
What is he going to do?  
Lance isn’t going to want to be his friend anymore.

He felt someone shake his shoulders.

“Come on Keith, we’re leaving” He got up and followed Lance out wordlessly.

“You zoned out pretty hard in there” Lance said chuckling

“Yeah, I just need to call my mom” He replied

He pressed the dial button on Shiro’s contact

“Hi mom, yeah I’m with Lance” he said  
“Ok so your school called me asking about the client I had who’s book I picked up”  
“Yeah they mentioned that”  
“Don’t panic. I told them nothing and I’m it going to tell them anything. All I said was that the client is in therapy and they are doing well and better than they were. They don’t know it’s you”  
“That’s good, ok”  
“You good?”  
“I think so yeah”  
“You need me call me or text me ok?”  
“Yeah, sure. I’ll text you when I’m almost home”  
“Bye”  
“Bye”

“Everything good?” Lance asked  
“Yeah, it’s fine”


End file.
